30 Seconds of Courage
Courage and conquering fear are these great positive psychology terms that you often hear from motivational speakers, books, and blogs. “If you could just drum up 30 seconds of courage and push through the discomfort, you’ll feel amazing on the other side.” I know…it’s a lot harder than the gurus make it look.
In fact, for many of us we might push through one scary event only to find that there’s another courage moment right on the other side. Ugh! Seriously? So in order to be courageous with our life, sometimes we need to be reminded that it’s okay to feel terrified, anxious and courageous all at the same time.
The Novice Mountain Bike Rider
I’m a huge fan of the outdoors and one of my values is adventure. Yet there are some adventures that my husband and I don’t quite see eye to eye on. He loves to mountain bike and really wants me to love the adventure as much as he does, but if I’m really honest…every time he wants me to go out I have to fight my fears and try to give myself a pep talk that I can do this.
You see he doesn’t just like flat road biking. No, today he took me on what was supposed to be a “mellow ride.” You know where I’m going with this!
It was 45 minutes uphill on a 1.5 foot wide trail along a scary mountain ledge with multiple boulders and tree limbs to navigate through. I seriously struggle with my perception through boulders, getting my pedals caught on rocks, having my back tire slip off the side of the road… and I don’t always make the hills.
Courage Phase Over and Over
We’re often faced with challenges and things we believe we can’t do. My mindset work has taught me when I’m in pain and don’t think I can push through “think of the part of your body that doesn’t hurt right now!” Woohoo, I made it to the top of a hill, and “oh no there’s another even bigger climb ahead!” Ugh!. I’m not gonna lie…there were a few expletives yelled during this ride. But if I’m really honest, it was really about my competitive side, and the fact that my husband who is older than me was killing this ride and I was struggling just to breathe!
Embracing the Suck
So we get to this really big hill which I had to walk my bike up…but then on the way back, he’s flying down the hill and I’m thinking “I’m going to die today!” Just to be clear, I was too afraid to ride down this crazy steep hill with boulders everywhere…We still have to be sensible! Yet my mood changed drastically when I embraced the process and started to lean into the suck knowing I had already overcome the hardest part. Now the way back was actually fun and invigorating with high speed and some risk taking along the windy twists.
What’s The Lesson?
Sometimes we need to push through to the other side in areas that we want to avoid. It’s easy to avoid things we’re not very good at and stay in our comfort zone with the things that we feel confident in. Yet growth happens with courage. Brené Brown says vulnerability is uncertainty, risk and emotional exposure. I hope you choose to live vulnerably, and embrace imperfection in the things you’re afraid of.
